Catalog: AGEING AND DYING

Drum Hill Essays

These first 38 essays plus the first "Penny" were all written while I lived at Drum Hill Senior Living Community in Peekskill, NY.

IN ITS TIME. While not written first, this would be chapter 1 in a collection of my writings. It tells the origins of the project, all the way back to my childhood. Contains anecdotes and humor (something that is true of many essays), as well as a song and a poem. Addendum includes one of my Scripture songs and the poem, "Not Growing Old." October, 2004. 5 pages.
STRIPPED NAKED: On Giving Up Privacy and Independence. Based on Shirley Thompson's organizing the women of the church to give me personal care on Saturday mornings, in this essay I explore all sorts of feelings that accompany having to let people help you. Bible stories about nakedness as well as stories of my life are included. Can a person be naked and still modest? September, 2004. 5 pages.
WILL WE KNOW EACH OTHER IN HEAVEN? In all the Bible classes I have taught on the subject of life after death, this question was asked more than any other. I answer it with a resounding "Yes," with evidence from the Bible and from contemporary life. January, 2005. 5 pages.
SAFETY AND STABILITY: Being Constantly Aware of God. Little did I know when I started this essay that I would be writing about the attributes of God! While we may become unsafe and unstable on our feet as we go through life, as I have, we can grow in feelings of safety and stability spiritually. It all depends on how we think of God. Divided into many sections, it is full of stories. A foundational essay. January, 2005. 13 pages.
LENGTH OF LIFE. Is long life necessarily a sign of God's favor? Or could the opposite be true? Has God promised us 70 years? Would you want to live forever on this earth in its present condition? These and other questions are addressed in this essay. September, 2004. 4 pages.
FATHER, GLORIFY YOUR NAME: Glorifying God In Death. Though most of my essays address the thoughts of ageing and dying, they are by no means morbid! I see death as a normal part of life and I want to glorify God in the process, just as Jesus did. November, 2004. 7 pages.
COMING FULL CIRCLE: On the Value of Life. In this essay I write about the similarities between babies and old people suffering from dementia. I watched my mother, now 96, come full circle and use this as a springboard for my thoughts. Does her life still have value? Does mine? December, 2004. 4 pages.
FLASHBACK. In January, 2004, during our first week at Drum Hill Senior Living Community, several things happened that reminded me of incidents much earlier in my life. This is the first piece I wrote in Drum Hill, little realizing that it would become one of a series on ageing and dying. Printed in The Drum Beat. February, 2004. 3 pages.
IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH. Has God promised good health to his people? If so, how do you explain the Bible stories of people who became ill in old age? And those who had chronic illness? Speaking from my own experience and those of others, I say no: God has not promised us good health. But there will be no sickness in Heaven: that's a promise! November, 2004. 5 pages.
SHOES. I thought I had accepted the fact that henceforth I would be wearing only shoes that reminded me of my grandma's oxfords. Then Mabel, my 89 year old table mate with terrible memory problems, made a comment that sent me reeling. I explore Bible stories about shoes before returning to the surprising conclusion to my story. November, 2004. 4 pages.
MEMORIALS: In Memory of Mabel. As soon as I heard that my table mate Mabel had died, I knew I would have to write about her. Portions of this essay were read at her memorial service. "Live in such a way that you will be missed!" is the moral of a story I tell. April, 2005. 3 pages.
EAT THIS BREAD; DRINK THIS CUP. "Write about something you really miss," my sister-in-law challenged. This essay, one of the most emotionally difficult for me to write, is the result of that challenge. Imagine my shock when I went to the communion rail and realized that both bread and juice were on my list of forbidden foods! January, 2005. 5 pages.
TEARS: A Time to Weep. A sequel to "Eat This Bread; Drink This Cup," it was written immediately afterwards. Contains stories from the Bible and my life about crying, as well as a list of more things that I miss. February, 2005. 6 pages.
DECISIONS, DECISIONS: Facing a Feeding Tube. Written partly in the style of a diary, this essay records the conflicting thoughts I went through before getting a feeding tube this June. Includes a sermon I preached in February, 2000 entitled "The Will of God." June, 2005. 9 pages.
OUTWARDLY. This is an original poem based on 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 and Isaiah 40:31. Included in the essay are a testimony and two of my Scripture songs. September, 2004. 2 pages.
THE ANSWER IS YES; WHAT IS THE QUESTION? "God is looking for people who will trust him enough to say yes before they know the questions; to sign a blank piece of paper and let God write on it whatever he wants; to pray with meaning 'Your will be done.'" This essay gives illustrations of this premise and tips for carrying it out. November, 2004. 4 pages.
LANDING GEAR. Why was the airplane shaking and making noise? "That's just the landing gear coming into place," the pilot said. "It's all normal. Don't worry." Suddenly I realized that the landing gear of my life was starting to fall into place! October, 2004. 2 pages.
HELP OF THE HELPLESS. This title comes from the hymn "Abide With Me." I think it would be a good name for God: Lord Help of the Helpless. While some people are self-sufficient in old age, we all start out helpless as babies. I explore a number of stories where God was there to help the helpless, including babies and young children. April, 2005. 6 pages.
REWARDS. What is the difference between a gift and a reward? God, who makes it very clear that salvation is a gift, also has much to say about rewards. What are they? And what does God reward? Should we desire these rewards? Includes a skit, a Scripture song, and a short story entitled "The Maypole Dance." July, 2005. 12 pages.
THERE IS A GOD. In "Rewards" I use the first verse of a poem God gave me on the day he met me on a ball field in 1953. This is the entire poem, along with a current testimony. May, 2005. 1 page.
'TIL DEATH DO US PART. All relationships are unavoidably changed by death at some point. How can we prepare for that? I use Elijah and Elisha, Ruth and Naomi, David and Jonathan, and "The Parable of the Candles" (concerning marriage) as illustrations. December, 2004. 9 pages.
FORGETTING (ON PURPOSE). There is a time to remember and a time to forget - on purpose! My Rear Guard, of whom I write in this essay, helps me to face the future rather than to dwell in the past. Contains a comparison of physical wounds and emotional wounds. November, 2004. 5 pages.
OH, WOW! Based on a comment made by my daughter's friend as death neared, this essay compares the glories of King Solomon's time, as seen by the Queen of Sheba, with the glories of Heaven, as seen by John and described in Revelation. March, 2005. 3 pages.
STIFFNESS. One of the common ailments that comes with ageing is stiffness in the joints and muscles. But far worse than that of the body, is stiffness, hardness, rigidity of soul and spirit. Offers hope for those who have been stiff-necked, hardhearted, closed-minded or rigidly legalistic. November, 2004. 3 pages.
HELPING THEM PACK. "At one time or another all of us are going to die. Those who belong to God's faith family will be moving to Heaven. Shouldn't we be packing, getting ready for the trip? Shouldn't we be helping others to pack? And if so, how?" November, 2004. 5 pages.
THE RIDDLE. Jesus said, "Those who believe in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die." Does a believer die or not? That's the riddle. Includes the poem "Body and Soul." August, 2004. 2 pages.
FLOURISHING IN OLD AGE. Psalm 92:12-15 mentions the righteous flourishing like a palm tree, still bearing fruit in old age. I use Moses as a beautiful illustration of flourishing in old age. Does your heart yearn along with mine as you consider these thoughts? August/September, 2004. 2 pages.
PREPARING TO DIE: The Example of Jesus. The gospels give us much information about how Jesus prepared himself and his followers for his death. Subtitles include Facing the Fact of Death; Looking Beyond: Letting Go; Taking Care of Business; Talking with His Father and Leaving a Legacy. Very practical. March, 2005. 11 pages.
TAKE UP YOUR CROSS: Identifying with Jesus. When Jesus told his followers to take up their cross and follow him, he was challenging them (and us) to a radical way of life that surely includes taking on the attitudes and characteristics of our Lord. Let's do it! April, 2005. 6 pages.
RESURRECTION: Changed! After the resurrection Jesus was still Jesus, but he certainly was changed! Examining these changes helps us anticipate the ones that we will undergo when the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable and we will be changed. Adventure awaits us! Contains a Scripture song. March, 2005. 6 pages.
CHOSEN. Would you consider it an honor to be chosen by God, not only to be his child, but to take part in a special project? Job and Esther are two people whose stories exemplify what I mean; this essay takes a look at both of them. There is still a spiritual drama going on around us today. Choosing to believe that I play a role in God's master plan makes my life an adventure. August, 2005. 12 pages.
NO OTHER GODS. This essay looks in depth at the first and second commandments: You shall have no other gods besides me and You shall not make for yourself an image and bow down and worship it. Isn't it sad that such commandments were necessary? But they were – and still are. Includes marvelous passages where the prophets compared God to idols. September, 2005. 9 pages.
LIVING LIFE ON TWO LEVELS. By this I mean the ability to live simultaneously on both an earthly and a spiritual level, merging the two so that no matter what is happening in this world or in your life, you know that somehow a larger, invisible world is also involved. Very practical. Contains Biblical and current life examples. September, 2005. 12 pages.
HALLOWEEN: ONLY HOLDING THE BAG. In my childhood I took part in a mischievous act that resulted in humiliation – and character building! – for me. God sees! October, 2005. 3 pages.
DANCING. When I told my son George about a heartwarming incident that took place in Drum Hill Senior Living Community, he asked if the story might be the basis for an essay. "Dancing" is the result of George's suggestion. A look at dancing in the Bible and in my life. October, 2005. 3 pages.
THE TELEPHONE. A strange thing happened in my childhood home the night we had our first telephone installed. The memory makes me laugh even now! I couple this story with a comparison between talking on the telephone and talking with God. God hears! November, 2005. 2 pages.
THE MISSISSIPPI RIVER: A ROMANCE. Until June of 1968, I never knew I had romantic feelings for the Mississippi River, but clearly I did. Nor did I realize until June of 1990 that the romance was over. What happened?? Is it wrong to have romantic attachments to places or things on earth? To be romantic? November, 2005. 3 pages.
INEXPRESSIBLE JOY. My friend Jane Leonard sent me a commentary on each of my essays that she read. I was so impressed by what she said about "Shoes!" One night I awoke with a poem expressing her thoughts in my mind. The poem and her words are in this essay. November, 2005. 2 pages.

Transitional Essays

Started at Drum Hill Senior Living Community and finished at Sky View Rehabilitation and Health Care Center.

ANECDOTES: FINDING MEANING IN MEMORIES. Intended at first to be a collection of stories to give our children for Christmas, a computer mishap forced me to start over again. This time I decided to form the anecdotes into an essay exploring the role that memories play in our lives. I'm glad to share these happy stories and would like to hear yours. February, 2006. 10 pages.
MY LORD AND MY GOD. When Thomas saw Jesus after the resurrection, he exclaimed, "My Lord and my God!" That was very personal. I decided to write about what makes God special to me, thinking it would be a relatively short piece. I should have known better! In the end I just had to stop the essay, for I could not exhaust the subject. Served as several sermons in Drum Hill. March, 2006. 11 pages.
STUFF: Material Things. Shirley, a widow beginning to dispose of her husband's belongings, told me something I said when downsizing from our house to the Drum Hill apartment was helping her: "It's all just stuff!" This essay, about stuff in the Bible and in my life, is the result of my musings on her comment. I use our digestive system as an analogy for handling material things: intake is important, but so is elimination! May, 2006. 9 pages.
EXCEPT FOR THESE CHAINS: A Testimony. In giving his testimony before King Agrippa, the apostle Paul, then a prisoner, said, "I pray God that all who are listening to me today may become what I am, except for these chains." He also said, "Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ." Would you like others to be like you spiritually, to follow you? Also, what does it mean to be Christ's ambassador? Is that how you see yourself? I do! June, 2006. 5 pages.

Sky View Essays

Written while living at Sky View Rehabilitation and Health Care Center. Until I can no longer write or the well of ideas runs dry, I intend to keep writing for the glory of God.

A ROOM WITH A VIEW: From Drum Hill to Sky View. The title of this essay reveals its contents. In it I reconstruct the events that led to my moving into a nursing home. The fingerprints of God are all over this story which I needed to tell for his glory. March, 2006. 5 pages.
THIS IS THE DAY. I had an unusual day on the first day of spring, March 20, 2006. Was the day profitable or a total waste? That all depends on your point of view. I enjoyed it. Many things are out of my control now, but I still have charge of my attitude! This is the day the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it. March, 2006. 3 pages.
WELCOME! A woman asked me why I decided to accept my crippling neurological disease (PLS) rather than fight it. This essay is my answer. I felt I had to begin by telling my readers who I am and how my mind works. After that I focus on my thinking about illness, especially my own, ending with a story that explains why I am at peace, enjoying my life with PLS. April, 2006. 6 pages.
ROOTS. In June, 2003, I wrote an article entitled "Annville, Pennsylvania: My Hometown" or "An Ode to South Lancaster Street." When people began asking about my background, I thought that piece could answer some of their questions. So I wrote a page of introductory comments, slightly edited the article and soon had an essay about a happy childhood. June, 2006. 9 pages.
WHERE IS HOME? I begin this essay by listing all the places I have lived for any length of time from birth until now. Can a room in a nursing facility be home? I say yes! But home is more than where we live. What makes us feel "at home"? Where is home ultimately? June, 2006. 4 pages.
EULOGIES: In Praise of My Parents. I was under the mistaken impression that eulogies were necessarily tied to comments given after a person had died. Finding out that eulogy means high praise opened my mind to new thoughts on the subject, both from the Bible and for my life! Contains eulogies I wrote for both my parents' funeral services. June, 2006. 5 pages.
PREPARE THE WAY. Many years ago I wanted to write a book about one of my role models: John the Baptist. Recently it occurred to me that an essay might be sufficient for my thoughts. What a delightful month I had concentrating on the man that Jesus said was the greatest of all those born of women! What did he mean by that? How did John prepare the way for the Lord? How can we do the same? July, 2006. 12 pages.
GENUINE FAITH. On October 2, 2006, a gunman walked into an Amish schoolhouse in Lancaster County, PA and killed 5 girls, wounding 5 others, before killing himself. As I watched the story unfold on television, I was so impressed by the demeanor of the Amish that I knew I would have to write about it. A deeply personal and emotional topic for me. January, 2007. 4 pages.
CLEANSE ME. After thanking the staff at Sky View for keeping my body clean, my thoughts move on to the inner cleansing that we so desperately need and that only God can provide. Two kinds of inner cleansing are addressed: the initial "bath" that removes our sins and makes us permanent members of God's family and the "foot washing" that we need at times to maintain our communion with God. Ends with a story and a challenge. May, 2007. 10 pages.
LIVING INCARNATELY. This essay, especially when paired with "A Room With a View," is designed to give readers an overview of what has happened in my life in the past five years and my attitude toward the situation. The centerpiece is "The Incarnation Letter" I wrote in 2003 to let people know of my condition. What does the Incarnation have to do with my living in a nursing home? Read and see! September, 2007. 4 pages.
CONTENTMENT. Wonderful thoughts about the source of Abraham's contentment unexpectedly yields answers to questions about the prosperity message commonly taught by television preachers. Can God's people be happy on this earth if they are not healthy and wealthy? Should they be? Includes a "sermon" by the apostle Paul on money. September, 2007. 11 pages.
TEAMWORK (A Tribute to the Gaithers). For nearly a year Bill and Gloria Gaither have been helping me advance God's kingdom here at Sky View – unknown to them! This is a tribute to the Gaithers, written to pay the debt of honor and respect I OWE this couple. Contains a duet and a trio that I wrote after being inspired by them. November, 2007. 7 pages.
TO THIS DAY. I didn't know until a few months ago that Jacob, as well as David, considered God to be his shepherd! That was the key that unlocked for me a whole new look at Jacob's life. It is full of instruction for us! Contains challenging privileges for those who are older. November, 2007. 3 pages.
ACROSS THE GENERATIONS. This essay includes a tribute to my mother's mother, Annie King Hicks Gibbel (1879-1960), who greatly influenced my life. Must a person believe in Jesus ONLY in order to be saved? What about my grandma? March, 2008. 6 pages.
GOD WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU. This essay, based on the old hymn by the same name, explores the meaning of that sentence from three perspectives: what the Scriptures say, what the hymn writer meant, and what I believe from my life experiences. I had a new thought while writing: what if we considered our hardships to be "sauerkraut" in the hands of God? August, 2008. 5 pages.